Thursday, 28 June 2018

The 37-27-42 Journey: 6 Weeks of 2B Mindset

It's safe to say that the last few weeks have been tricky with regard to healthy living. I've found myself veering off the rails more than once. In fact, here is my List of Shame:

  • I ate two burgers (one was buttermilk chicken and blue cheese, the other was supposedly a steak burger but was really just one of those cheapo burgers you get at the end of a night out) over my graduation weekend, and I do not regret eating either of them because they were both delicious.
  • My snack of choice while in my hotel room over the weekend was a tube of Texas BBQ Pringles.
  • I've been snacking in the evenings again. Not as bad as I used to, when I would just plough through chocolate and biscuits like there was no tomorrow, but still enough to violate the 'no snacks after dinner' rule.
  • The regular walks that my mum and I have been taking in the evenings are becoming more sparse, and the excuses are coming out in full force. I should point out that the excuses are from me - Mum still wants to walk because she's far more motivated than I am.
  • On my breaks at work, I've frequently been buying cakes and scones to snack on.

Yeah, it hasn't been a good few weeks for my healthy eating kick. That being said, my mum and I had our first check in on Tuesday, getting our measurements taken and getting weighed, and it turned out that I had lost 4.2% body fat as well as 5kg, which roughly translates to the 10lbs that I watched come off in the first few weeks of my 2B Mindset journey. And yes, that was amazing to see, but there's still a tiny part of me that's disappointed that it's not more, and that I haven't managed to dip down below the 14st mark. During the four days I was back in Dundee, I put on 2lbs. To be honest, I expected it to be more, and it was a relief to find that it was only two. But were those ice cream sundaes and big breakfasts and glasses of prosecco really worth it?

(Spoiler alert: they were. They definitely were.)

When it comes down to it, my weekend away was just one extended cheat day. I know that I could have tried a little harder to stay on track, but I was too busy celebrating to worry about how much water I was drinking or how many vegetables I was eating. I just need to pick myself back up and continue from here. It's not like the situation is unsalvageable. 

But there are other aspects of this lifestyle change that are starting to prove difficult.

Although I am by no means an experienced dietician or life coach, I have noticed that there are several things that affect how invested you are in maintaining a healthy lifestyle. It's obviously important to keep a positive mindset when tackling a lifestyle change, but it's impossible to be positive all the time. I know that, when I have a lousy day at work or I'm feeling lazy or it's that time of the month and I JUST CAN'T DEAL ANYMORE, I just want to slouch on the sofa and tuck into a bar of chocolate or a big bowl of ice cream. And it's hard when temptation is still very much present, even though your home is mostly full of healthy food and even healthy snacks aren't going to count against you. At my job, I still find myself salivating over the meals that I take out to customers (not literally, otherwise I would be amazed if I'd made it through my first shift without getting sacked), and every day, I find myself getting almost triggered (the only word I can really think of to describe it) by something new. One day it might be a black pudding roll, the next it might be a tuna melt panini, the next it might be something as simple as a bowl of chips covered in salt and vinegar. Carbs, glorious carbs.

But it's the cakes that make it really hard. Big slabs of chocolate fudge cake the size of doorsteps, giant scones that you could use as paperweights, right down to the dainty little flapjacks that nobody buys: they're all guilty of making me hungry. And, as stated in my List of Shame, I've regularly been caving and eating a little something sweet during my morning breaks instead of a healthier option like baked pea crisps or a pot of fruit.

In short, I've fallen off the wagon a little. I think that a lot of it has just been bad timing, what with graduation, hay fever season and the drowsiness that it brings, and still feeling a little homesick after leaving Dundee for the foreseeable future. But that's not reason enough for me to just give up and go back to where I was, eating a whole pack of doughnuts in one day and still having room for pasta and garlic bread at dinner. I like how far I've already come in these last six weeks, and I like knowing that I'm becoming a healthier person. Knowing that I can occasionally treat myself is comforting, but I shouldn't allow myself to get carried away and eat until I feel ill. Now that all my graduation chocolates are out of the way, the rest of the journey should hopefully be a little easier.


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